We Did It

I got some good news this week and it is this: as far as we know right now I am Cancer Free, Babyyy! (you should click play on the sound below)

My surgeon phoned me while I was following my boy through a grocery store. It was right around supper time and there were very few customers, and at this particular store there are child-size shopping carts that Avery just loves. We had our list covered and were meandering toward the tills when my phone rang.

The surgeon informed me that the pathology report had come back on the growth they removed in surgery, and the news was good. He said the tumor showed signs of being reduced by the treatments last year, and had “good margins”, which he explained but I also looked up at home; it turns out that when excising a tumor you take a layer of the healthy tissue surrounding it as well. When the mass is examined later, this layer is checked, and if cancer cells are found, there’s a chance it wasn’t all removed in surgery. In my case, the healthy tissue layer was intact.

The surgeon also removed a suspicious lymph node that was near the mass and showed up as a bit enlarged on scans. This node was worrisome because — as I understand the human body — the lymph nodes are like Super Mario-style Warp Pipes for cancer. If a node is infected, the cancer can get into the lymphatic system and pop back out basically anywhere. Thankfully, that lymph node was found to be clear as well! Hopefully I can do without it? It doesn’t seem to have been load-bearing, in any case.

_{[Editor’s note! Another quick search reveals that people have, on average, 600-800 nodes around their body. Removing them is not without risk, but for me, the benefits greatly outweighed those risks. And overall I’m probably not going to miss it.]}

I’ll admit that the excitement of the news did not occur to me right away. I was happy that the results were good, but it wasn’t until I started getting really excited reactions from others that I realized “Oh, this is like, really good news. Great, even.” In part this is probably because I received the news while half-distracted by my small child going this way and that through the produce department. But, as I’ve thought about it over the week, I think that part of my subdued reaction is because that it just hadn’t occurred to me that the surgery would not have worked. (Not bothering to think of negative outcomes is a theme that has definitely come up before on this blog.) I think in my mind I was irrationally convinced that all the pain and suffering guaranteed a positive outcome — otherwise, what was it all for? Nothing?? Impossible.

In any case I’ve been spreading the news all week long, and now I spread it to: you, dear reader! Thank you again for coming along on this journey with me.

In other post-surgery news, my recovery is still continuing, and even though not every day is easy they are getting easier on average. Also, I’ve gotten Good Enough At Colostomy that my home care visits have officially ended. This is good because I can now change bags on my own schedule. Lastly, I know I threatened to slow down at posting a few weeks ago, but I still feel like I’m coming up with things to talk about, so we’ll see you here again next week I guess.