A Journey Within a Journey

Blister packs containing my entire course of chemo for this round (Enterprise for scale)

Today, my first round of treatments officially began. I took the first dose of chemotherapy medication after breakfast (4 pills down, 196 to go) and we got ready to head back to the CancerCare building near the Health Sciences Centre in Winnipeg. This will be where I go every weekday for the next month-and-a-bit.*

Once there, I did a quick check-in, a brief wait, and before I knew it I was on their table while they used my tattoos to align me with the lasers. The staff are efficient but pleasant and they complimented my socks, which had Game Boys and Tetris blocks on them and were indeed pretty great. Next, they left the room but monitored me through cameras and microphones in case I need anything, but in general I’m not to move for the next few minutes.

The table is in the lower-left of the frame. They can move me remotely, too.

The machine buzzed and slowly rotated around me, and as promised, I didn’t feel a thing. Some music by Jack Johnson floated in from a CD player elsewhere in the room — a little out of place in a place of high tech and serious diagnoses, but still nice. And then: we were done!

I went back outside into the bright day, and then we were off to grab lunch and pick up my brother for a ride back to Winkler. We talked about cats and computers. After supper I took my second dose of chemo meds.

I feel almost no different, as expected. I know the effects of these treatments are cumulative and things will probably get worse before they get better. I’ve had some dark and anxious times in the past few weeks, but today was actually a good day and I felt cheerful and optimistic throughout. I had several messages of support this morning, and I know people are praying for us and thinking of us often. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: thank you all.

Just twenty-four more radiation treatments and a hundred and ninety-two pills to go!

*The opening ceremonies for the 2024 Summer Olympics happen to take place on the same day as my treatments end; I am going to pretend they are celebrating in my honour.

Bridging the Gap

This week, we went on a road trip. Earlier this year we had been planning a trip to an indoor water park / resort in Minneapolis, called Great Wolf Lodge. When I got my diagnosis it seemed like we wouldn’t be able to go anymore, but suddenly we had a couple of weeks with no tests or consultations on the calendar. With the support and encouragement of doctors, nurses, and our kiddo’s teacher, we embarked on a compressed version of the trip we’d planned. 

It was exhausting and sometimes overwhelming, but totally worth it. Lori and I wanted some happy experiences for our family before things change due to my treatment schedule and its potential side effects. 

I’ll set my griping about theme resorts and capitalism to one side so I can talk about my picture. That’s me on a ropes course at the Lodge, in the middle of (slowly) making my way across a wobbly rope bridge. My daughter challenged me to try it after she’d gotten across herself. My balance is not great so my heart was racing. I had to focus on controlling my breathing. But I wanted to know that I could do the scary thing, and in the end, I did! 

(Epilogue: The upper level of the ropes course had trickier elements that neither of us were ready to try, so we called it quits after that. Do the scary thing, but know your limits, too 😅)

In less than a week I start daily radiation and chemotherapy treatments. It is also a scary thing and I cannot know how it will go for me, as everyone responds differently. But hey, I got across the rope bridge; a fancy flashlight and a couple of pills should be no problem! 

Well, I can hope so, anyway!

Next Steps

(Editor’s note: I’m still sort of figuring out my ‘voice’ when it comes to writing about my journey, so please forgive any wild swings in tone between posts)

This week I did the radiation simulation to prepare for my treatments later this month. After arriving at CancerCare Manitoba in Winnipeg, I was told to use the bathroom and then drink a fairly specific amount of water with a bit of contrast fluid inside. The amount of water — 325ml — will be a part of my daily treatments, as they want my bladder to be roughly the same size each time they irradiate me. After waiting an hour in their (comfortable, spacious) waiting area for the contrast to settle in, I was brought in for one more CT scan.

These images will help them shape the radiation beam when treating me, and it was also a trial run at aligning my body on the table. You can see laser lines in the second image that were for this purpose, but also, I got my first-ever tattoos; a tiny dot, the size of a freckle, on each hip. These are permanent, and will make it easier to get me lined up perfectly each day. 

Everyone we’ve met has been patient and gracious so far. I’m trying to reflect those qualities back!

In other news, folks can sign up to drive me to treatment appointments in Winnipeg! I’ve added a bunch of dates to the Calendar area of this site, and though June is covered, there are still several open days in July. If the promise of sparkling conversation isn’t enough, South Central Cancer Resource reimburses clients for mileage and parking, so I can pass that benefit along and offset some of your costs. Thanks One Million to them, and to the volunteers who have reached out to us so far! I’m honored!